José Mourinho loses with dignity, but only if he hasn’t lost it too

It was, it must be said, typical José Mourinho. Just minutes before he ranted at English referee Anthony Taylor in the parking lot of the Puskas Stadium and called him a “f**king disgrace”, he had told the post-Europa League final media conference: “I told my players you can lose a match but never your dignity. We lost today but we did not lose our dignity.”

“F**king disgrace, man, it’ sa f**king disgrace,” went Mourinho in the most dignified of ways. “Congratulations, you f**king disgrace. F**k off.”

Mourinho said Taylor had refereed “like a Spaniard”, some decisions were a “scandal” and “bullshit”. It was one of the more spectacular meltdowns from a man who has perfected the spectacular meltdown to such a degree that he would win gold if it was an Olympic competition. The record will show Sevilla beat Roma 4-1 on penalties, there was almost 30 minutes of stoppage time and 13 yellow cards across the two teams.

There are few things more glorious in sport than a full-on meltdown from a grown man or woman or whatever you identify as these days. Mourinho identifies as a nihilist, a brutal, obsessive winner, an end-justifies-the-means coach who is spoiling for a fight whether he wins or loses. But, let’s let him take up the story.

“I must say we’re used to this,” he said on Wednesday night, “but this is a European final and with this kind of refereeing, it is hard to accept. If we talk about refereeing situations, it’s not two or three: it is many, quite apart from the big decisions. Those of us who have been in football a long time realise immediately what is going on.

“Pellegrini falls in box and given a yellow card; Ocampos did exactly the same thing and he doesn’t get one. It’s a scandal. VAR called the referee and shames Ocampos but there’s no card given. Lamela — who, by the way, scored one of the penalties — deserved a second yellow but didn’t get it.

“And let’s not even talk about the big decisions. That’s just the small details. I told my players you can lose a match but never your dignity. We lost today but we did not lose our dignity. I won five finals but I have never been more proud than I am today. Happier, yes, but not more proud.”

Happy, proud, more lucrative, as Radiohead would never have put it. It’s the brand of the Special One, the reason he earns an estimated £22m. He has almost as many endorsements as he has touchline bans.

Adidas, Heineken, American Express, Hublot, Jaguar, Braun, Samsung, EA Sports, BT Sports, Atlantis Hotels and Lipton Tea are all or have been aboard the bad ship José. When he joined Spurs, sponsored by Nike, he kept his relationship with Adidas. No-one tells the Special One what to do.

In 2022 he starred in a music video with English rapper Stormzy, repeating his famous quote, made after a loss when at Chelsea: “I prefer really not to speak. If I speak I’m in big trouble.”

When he moved to Roma two weeks after he had been sacked by Spurs, he told his first press conference at the Italian club that he had seen the light and was a changed man. Less special one that specious one as it turned out: “I won’t be the one going looking for trouble. I have more experience now. I’m more solid emotionally.”

Recently, he was so solid emotionally in March that he was sent off during the loss to Cremonese. A foul on Marash Kumbulla by Frank Tsadjout was not given and the fourth official got both barrels from the angry one.

Marco Serra, the fourth official, apparently told him: to mind his “own f**king business” and to “sit down, everyone’s taking the p*ss out of you”. The referee then told Mourinho there was a special space for him in the stands.

And we can’t stop watching him. Why? Who knows? As Jonathan Wilson wrote in the Guardian on Thursday: “José Mourinho, perhaps, is a pleasure better remembered than experienced. We chuckled at him wearing a wire, at him laying into Daniel Levy with the scorn that only he can muster. Classic José, we said with a smile. Still fighting the bad fight. Still harrumphing and provoking and spoiling. And then you actually watch his Roma play — and, as it turned out, lose. And that is dreadful.”

Dreadful, sulky, grouchy, angry and watchable. He will be around for a few more years. We’ll miss him when he’s gone.